One More Light

I remember when I first got Hybrid Theory.  I don’t remember how old I was.  I don’t even remember how I was listening to it.  But man, I remember my mom’s comment.  One Step Closer came over the speaker and I yelled along “Shut up when I’m talking to you.  SHUT UP!  SHUT UP!  SHUT UP!”  I was a teenager, and it was my anthem on moody, angsty days.  My mother was none too pleased.  I don’t recall her exact quote but it was something along the lines of, “Well that isn’t very nice!”  I still smile every time I think about that small little interaction from my high school years.

And then Meteora.  Oh man.  I wrote song fics based off Meteora.  I love Meteora.  Reanimation?  It stole my soul.  My December.  Minutes to Midnight.  I bled it out with them.  Skip A Thousand Suns and Hunting Party and Living Things.  There were some years there where I stuck to the good old songs.  But then came Recharged.  I was hooked again.

Now I have One More Light in my CD player in my car (yes, my car is that old).  It took a while for me to warm up to, but damn.  Heavy is my soul anthem.  I will blast that song with the windows down on the way to a long day at work.  It sees my soul.  And One More Light breaks my heart.

Now I know why.  Battle Symphony and Heavy are my anthems, but One More Light is a depressing album.  I’ve listened and dissected the lyrics enough to know in the dozens of repeats.  I understand the struggle.  Not to the level that Chester felt it, but Linkin Park has spoken to me – to my hurt, my isolation, my fears, my loneliness, my anger, my frustration – for over a decade.  I will rock them forever.  I will never listen to One More Light the same way again.

Who cares if one more light goes out?
In a sky of a million stars
It flickers, flickers
Who cares when someone’s time runs out?
If a moment is all we are
We’re quicker, quicker
Who cares if one more light goes out?

Well I do.

We do.

Thank you.  For the lyrics and the music and the expression of the feelings we’ve all felt in the lower points in our life.  We won’t forget it.  We will hopefully learn from the shock of today’s news.  We will hopefully look for the signs.  We will try to help, to reach out a lifeline.  We will scream at the top of our lungs with someone else to let it out.  To keep them one step further from the edge, to keep them from breaking.

Should’ve stayed, were there signs, I ignored?
Can I help you, not to hurt, anymore?
We saw brilliance, when the world, was asleep
There are things that we can have, but can’t keep

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